Wars and Rumors of Wars


It’s getting exciting. Kind of like when the Soviets shot down that Korean Airlines flight back in the dark ages of 1983. Ronald Reagan wanted to show that the Russian Bear was a dangerous animal, while the rest of the West was slouching towards detente. The Soviets handed him a grand propaganda victory. Of course, there is no Soviet Union anymore. But we’ve got us brand new Cold War, kids, just like when daddy was your age. This is so much better than fighting terrorists anyway.

Back in the old days, when it was West versus East, ideologies neatly divided the world. The Western hemisphere was ours, so when Soviet missiles were sent to Cuba, we very nearly had a nuclear war. We didn’t think it was so bad, however, to wage a proxy war in Afghanistan, outfitting the glorious mujahideen against the dirty Commies. Or in a hundred other places in “their” hemisphere.

So what we can we do about it? Not much actually. The “strong defense” policy of the Republicans is an empty suit and the Russians know it and we know they know it. George Bush may have promised the Georgians: “The path of freedom you have chosen is not easy, but you will not travel it alone. Americans respect your courageous choice for liberty. And as you build a free and democratic Georgia, the American people will stand with you.” But he didn’t mean it. What he meant was, “Look, we’re not going to do anything to help you because we can’t. I destroyed the military capability of my country in my vain attempt to create the 51st American state in Iraq. So you’re on your own. What about that swimmer dude? Wasn’t that like 8 medals?”

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